Did God evolve?
It would explain a lot.
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Wait..., what? No!!!
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He does evolve with the times, or at least his words, and how they are meant to be taken do. Once upon a time Bible was law, and it was an absolute true story meant to guide your life directly. Now it's a loose amalgam of tales meant to give you ideas on how lead a life that will allow you into heaven. Side: It would explain a lot.
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