I've lived with 9 cats and 3 dogs over the course of my life but never once lived in a house where anyone did the tp under, and we never had a problem because we left the dangly bit on top of the roll when we were done. Cats and dogs will go at that shit if anything is hanging off any which way, front or back, it doesn't matter. That's why you leave it on top, out of their line of sight.

There's a dick tucked under a designer skirt on every page of Cosmopolitan if you know where to look. Lots of overly-feminine female models are actually men; why shouldn't women be allowed the same freedom?

From a musical perspective they should really be using proper grammar, here. It wouldn't mess up the flow and would simultaneously make them seem like semi-literate, semi-educated individuals.

In 5 years that chick is going to have the most unattractive rack, ever. She clearly already has breast implants, and over time her breasts will continue to grow (more so if she gets pregnant at any time) and sag. Pretty soon her tits are something you're actively trying to avoid looking at as opposed to uncontrollably staring at. Better to pick women with a small to normal sized rack, that way once age and pregnancy set in you end up with a girl like the rack in the picture and you already had a girl with a nice pair to begin with.

Sorry to go on that shallow rant on the physical appearance of women, but I've never understood the male infatuation with massive boobs. They don't look particularly flattering from the get go (out of a bra, anyways), and over time they start to look quite terrible. My general rule is if they are too much for me to handle with one hand, they're too damn big.

NOTE TO THE WORLD: The anus is for exit, not entree (entering)! :)

You notice nobody ever turns down a blowjob on the basis that "that's not what your mouth is designed to do," yet for some reason that argument (essentially) is so often used to justify not trying/doing anal.

I guess I can agree so long as we can also agree there's a right and wrong way to be straight. Wasted bros who take their shirts off at house parties and flex in the living room in a shameless attempt to attract women, for example. Dirty bops who go out dressed like prostitutes are another good example. Ever been to a rave or a frat party? Give em a shot if you ever wanna see people being straight in all the wrong ways.

Personally I've only ever said "no" to drugs I've already tried... you never know if you're gonna like something until you try it. Same logic my parents used to get me to eat disgusting sprouts now applied to drug use.

I always use my normal voice with babies. Not with pets, but with children I think it helps them mature and learn their language faster. My cat is never going to learn English, so I don't think I'm fucking that up for him when I baby-talk at him.

You're debates are still uncannily easy to identify as joecavalry debates. Someones bitching about iPhones? Must be ones of joe's debates.

I wouldn't be particularly fond of looking like I'm 50 when I'm really 20.

And I'm not a health freak, but living in an age where a slight cut on your finger meant painful infection and a horrible death, or where the common cold had a 100% fatality rate doesn't appeal to me, either.

I spend most of my time on Google earth looking for chicks who went out to sunbathe topless at the wrong time. Good to know you're doing something more productive with the program; espionage.

I've dated both vegetarians and vegans... their food related beliefs never impaired them in that area.

Though I used to give them shit for it.

But hey, gotta get your protein, somehow.